November 19, 2007
BlueRidge Group
Ashley Metts, Steve Rule, Nate Buttars
Mr. Donald Richards
Bureau of Special Education
2394 16th street, S.E. , Suite 301
New York, NY 11102
Dear Mr. Richards,
The Special Education Advancement program, New York City’s largest organization dealing with elementary through high school aged children in need of special education, invites you to join the $75,525 project in an effort to better special education programs in public schools in New York City.
Being that your organization deals with special education you understand the immense underfunding from the government amongst programs in the city. In an effort to rectify this problem we have outlined several new tactics that we hope will help with the lack of attention and skilled instructors in this field.
The first tactic will involve monthly paid workshops for individuals teaching in the special education departments in public schools. This will account for approximately 60% of the previously disclosed budget. These workshops will teach instructors the latest in special education techniques and as conditions and syndromes are different for each child instructors need to be equipped to handle the less severe cases as well as the most serious conditions. As the pay for special education teachers is quite meager this will also act as an extra incentive to teach as the monthly workshops will be paid, as well as the instructors will have a much better understanding of conditions and how best to deal with them.
The next largest allocation, 25%, of funding will go to improving facilities. Many parents with children in the need of special education would prefer to have their children sent to private institutions in order to receive the best care, however, in many of the inner city schools the majority of the parents do not have the means financially to send their children to these better equipped schools. The new facilities we have planned will not only provide an alternative for parents who cannot afford private care, but will hopefully encourage parents who have opted to use private care to reconsider. These facilities will have the latest in education tools in order to provoke creativity as well as understanding of fundamental concepts.
The remainder of the budget will be divided amongst educational information (i.e. textbooks, computer programs, etc.) and field trip opportunities for the students. As educational information is much different and at a slower pace than the age equivalent of students not in the special education program textbooks are different. While the government has supplied textbooks and other supplies for the program they are severely outdated and therefore of little use in the new program. New up to date textbooks and supplies will be purchased in order to give these students the best education possible.
As you can see our foundation has students best interest in mind and we feel that with our outline we will be able to seriously improve the special education program in our city. As our company lacks the means financially to enact the prementioned tactics of improvement. AS a result we are reaching out for help from other organizations who share our same hopes.
An investment in our cause will greatly enhance circumstances amonst special education programs within our city, a problem that has been ignored for too long. Thank you in advance for your consideration. Senior Project Developer for this program, Ralph Edwards, can be reached at (342)785-3788 for further information.
Sincerely,
BlueRidge Group
President
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2 comments:
Great job targeting company that is in the same area of your purpose. The letter is very professional and is formatted well. I would say to just read through it and make some small grammatical errors.
You do well in identifying how the money will be used. Talk more specifically about what effect you think these uses will have. What will happen because of doing these things? Also be specific in identifying what the audience will get out of this. If he donates the money, what does he get in return?
You start right off by identifying the $75,525 project, but you don't specifically say how much you expect from the target audience. You say "the" project before you have ever identified what the project is....avoid that; put "a" instead. Put the amount you are asking for from the audience in the second or third paragraphs, usually.
Remove extraneous adjectives and adverbs, like "immensely".
Correct little grammatical mistakes like not having spaces where you should, capitalizing words and letters that shouldn't be, and forgetting to put possessive apostrophes.
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